The Prophet's Ears

This chick rawks! I haven't read all her stuff yet, but the video rants alone make me a huge fan of Joy Nash. Check her out!

http://fatrantblog.wordpress.com/

So, I love my Notes from the Universe and all...



The veils begin to lift, once defenses begin to fall.

Be vulnerable.

The Universe

Fear only hides the truth.



...but where exactly have you been for the past couple years of my life??? lol Ummm...hello, have we met??

I've recently been communicating with a "women only" spa. I'm often read as male (though I don't identify as such) and I enquired ahead of time to find out whether or not I'd be welcomed there by the establishment. As their policy is to ensure the comfort of their patrons, they eventually implied that I shouldn't come (without literally saying that). Apparently, I don't qualify as one of those people worthy of feeling comfortable or safe in that space. I'm not sure yet how to further approach this situation, but I know I'm not done with it.

I had SUCH a wonderful experience today. :) My heart is happy. And I'm soon off to the cottage for the weekend. Life...is good.

I'd appreciate input in this matter from anyone who would care to respond. (that's pretty much directed at you, Kit...since no one else seems to be reading! lol) :P

I'm applying for a position (of sorts) at a women's organization. Since they encourage marginalized women of various identifications to apply, they've asked for me to self-identify if I feel comfortable to do so.

I identify as a queer boi. I'm not sure how to articulate the "boi" thing (to someone who may not be overly familiar with gender-variance) in a way that aptly acknowledges my continued connection to my womanness.

Any suggestions?

This is the list of potential applicants they particularly encourage: Aboriginal and First Nations women, women of colour, women with disabilities, trans women, intersexed women, two-spirited women, LGBQQ women, and low-income women

It kind of comes across to me like they're trying to include 3rd wave concepts with a 2nd wave perspective. But I really do like the way the organization operates (at least what I've seen so far).

So, I'll be back in class tomorrow. I'm looking forward to the new start (again) and most of my courses. I'm in serious need of a priorities overhaul though. If I don't focus my energies on my studies this year, it's not going to be pretty. I was fortunate enough to be able to pull an F in one of my classes up to a B+ with a kick-ass paper I wrote at the end of last semestre...but I still have outstanding course work due in another class, and have upped my course load this year to try and make it out of here before I'm 80 (and in debt up to my eyeballs).

I want to try and implement some new habits this fall, like:

1. getting up at the same time every morning, regardless of whether or not I have a class

2. going for a walk before I start the rest of my day

3. eating more regularly (which I'm finding to be quite a challenge as a "starving" student)

4. letting go of my need for more mind-related stimulation and perhaps even lose the `net connection *gasp!*

5. make my study time more public, in the hopes of feeling more accountable (if not to myself, then to some external source)

I still need to figure out what I'm doing with my life (academically and career-wise). The news this past spring that I wouldn't be able to obtain a student loan to get my certification as a Life Coach was daunting, to say the least. A BA in Women's Studies is unlikely to get me very far without some other hard-core trainings. But I must keep pluggin' away, as anything could change my life direction (or circumstances) in an instant. I do so love the majority of my experience here at York and will continue to work on finding an alternate route to my desired destination.

Today, I will:

- finish my OSAP application

- set-up my "new" scanner that's been sitting in the box for over 3 months

- work on journals for my Transfeminisms class after Jen gets here

- assemble all paperwork for appt. with Dr. tomorrow

- go fly my kite

- love what is

You're Watership Down!

by Richard Adams

Though many think of you as a bit young, even childish, you're
actually incredibly deep and complex. You show people the need to rethink their
assumptions, and confront them on everything from how they think to where they
build their houses. You might be one of the greatest people of all time. You'd
be recognized as such if you weren't always talking about talking rabbits.


Take the Book Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.

Had a pretty good few days out of the city. I went up to visit my mom, and we ended up going to her cottage for most of the weekend. I also got to see my 3 month old nephew, Sam, for the first time and had a chance to spend a little time with his 3 year old brother, Eric.

I suck with little kids. I truly do. I like them, but I'm not good with them (until they're older). I don't know how to play...really. And I find it so hard to just let go and have unadulterated fun. I've been trying to make some changes with that, but it's so freakin' difficult to change years & years of learned and integrated behaviours, that I feel like I'm not making much progress.

Anyway, it was a treat to have some time with the kids, and it always makes me smile when I see the way my brother and Mel parent. I wish more kids had parents like Eric & Sam do.

I found out late last week that I failed one of my courses. I got a fucking F! I've never received an F in my life. I'm not pleased (as could be expected). I really messed up this year.

On a more uplifting note, someone is seeking me out to give a workshop at a women's retreat in the fall. I'm so excited! This is what I wanted - an opportunity to:

a) share my thoughts/experience on a particular subject about which I feel passionate
b) practice that presentation and become more familiar with the process
c) make a name for myself in workshop facilitation
d) work for/with women and queers

We have much yet to discuss, but it seems like a good fit for both myself and the group, so I'm definitely looking forward to it! YAY!!

I saw Kim today - first time in 5 months. We didn't actually speak or anything, I just saw her heading for lunch as I rode by on the streetcar. I had mixed emotions about it - happy to see she was (or at least appeared to be) OK, but angry that she was (or at least appeared to be) OK. I do want her to be well, but if she's well then why the FUCK can't she/didn't she be in-touch with me...if not five months ago, surely since then. I just can't seem to get past this.

I continue to be baffled by people I establish connections with just turning tail without any communication about it at all. I'm not getting it. What am I missing?

If someone decides, for whatever reason, that they're no longer interested in spending time with me...fine. I've no desire to force someone to spend time with me. I enjoy my connections with people, and if I'm with you, there's something about you that I like. If you're not feelin' any connection, I encourage you to go elsewhere...but have the GD decency to talk to me about it! Geez. Alright, I seriously need to do something about this, cuz it happened again with someone I met more recently. I wasn't nearly as attached to her as to Kim or Jillene...but why would someone do that at all? I really just don't get it. Can somebody help me here?? PLEASE!

There are the things you know you know. There are the things you know you don't know. And then there are the things you don't know you don't know. Case in point: Your dreams, how they're going to come true, and the inevitability of your eternal joy.

The Universe

Or how about the best friends you've yet to meet, who even now draw ever near...



Thanks...I needed that!

Your Intrapersonal Intelligence Score: 82%

Your Intrapersonal Intelligence is Very High You've spent a lot of time introspecting, and it's really paid off. You are comfortable with who you are, and you have a life philosophy that you are happy to live by. And you're always re-evaluating what you believe. Because you learn something new about yourself each day!

Your Interpersonal Intelligence Score: 70%

Your Interpersonal Intelligence is High You are definitely a "people person." You enjoy spending time with others. You instinctively understand people, and you are both a good counsellor and mediator. However, there are definitely times when you've had enough. And that's when you cherish being alone.

Your Birthdate

You're not good at any one thing, and that's the problem. You're good at so much - you never know what to do. Change is in your blood, and you don't stick to much for long. You are destined for a life of travel and fun. Your strength: Your likeability Your weakness: You never feel satisfied Your power color: Bright yellow Your power symbol: Asterisk Your power month: May

I feel loved when...

The Five Love Languages

My Primary Love Language is Physical Touch

My Detailed Results:

Physical Touch:	9
Quality Time:	8
Acts of Service:	6
Words of Affirmation:	6
Receiving Gifts:	1

About this quiz

Unhappiness in relationships is often due to the fact that we speak different love languages. It can be helpful to know what language you speak and what language those around you speak.

Tag 3 people so they can find out what their love language is.

Take the Quiz!
Check out the Book

Look! I'm starting to make other friends here!! lol Actually, I'm just finally starting to take the time to explore LJ a little (and finding some people I already know). :P

Somedays, my Notes from the Universe make me feel more visible (and appreciated) than others...


Do you have any idea, of how many fans you have here in the unseen?

Students from far and wide. Admirers from near and far. Friends from other lands and other times. And do you know what they talk about the most when your name comes up?

Besides your French Toast?

Besides your saunter?

Besides your home here with the holiday lights you leave up year-round, the roaming wildebeests in the backyard, and the answering machine that says,"Off having the time of my life in the jungles of time and space..."

Your belief in the goodness of others.

10,000 Kisses -
The Universe


Yep... Even though we don't use time here, the "K" Calendar is a perennial best seller.

Well, I've bought myself some time...and a little peace of mind. Had/have a bizillion things due all at the same time right now, and was stressing so much that I'm sure I would've exploded last night, had I not opted for a much-needed reality check. If I don't get my work done on time, or to the calibre with which I'm pleased...no one's gonna die, and my future will not be horrendously scarred.

*In thru the nose.....
.....Out thru the mouth*

Options, I've got lotsa options...and some wonderful profs, I must add.

Going to try my best to finish out this year, and then figure out what the hell I'm doing with my life after that - continuing on @ York...going to Adler...life on the street...starting my own business...checking into The Clarke...